Author Archive

If peeing your pants makes you cool, I’m Miles Davis…

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Listening to jazz while I drive is probably one of the coolest things I do. It’s an escape from my mundane, white, jaded, stuffy reality. For 20-60 minutes a day I get to… Continue reading

Hey bro, do you even lift?

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Recently, there have been moments where I wonder what the hell I’m doing with myself. Today, after strapping on a 15 pound dip belt and knocking out 15 pull-ups in my door jamb,… Continue reading

Tyler’s Corner- Cake Fingers.

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Sometimes in life, often when you least expect it, all it takes is a split second moment, a flash, to shake you from the cycle of denial and reassurance that’s carried you through… Continue reading

Why do I daydream?

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So, a little after 10:30 tonight I picked up a six-pack and five dollars worth of Super Lotto tickets from Rod’s Liquor, and in doing so realized that I was a pack of… Continue reading

Happy fucking 100 posts and shit, sons!

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This is a draft that Tyler had been sitting on for a long time. Being the narcissist that I am and because he was writing about something that I did, I’m posting it… Continue reading

Oh. Snap.

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What would Mao think?

It’s raining, Mike, it’s raining.

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Relax, Mike, relax. I have an exam this week and next week is finals week, which means Gay sex is going to have to wait. You’re welcome to come over and help me… Continue reading

Shit My Patients Say

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The best kind of humor is the kind that’s unintentionally morbid. While working with a geriatric patient who recently underwent neurosurgery, Kevin, a physical therapist and co-worker of mine asked the patient if… Continue reading

My Favorite Things.

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Friends, I really hate November. For me it means dry skin, chapped lips, cold hands, and a bad attitude. You know that Descendents song, “Everything Sucks”? Well, that’s how I feel about the… Continue reading

Tyler is Dead

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Blah, Blah, Blah. You’re worse than my statistics professor, Mike Apathy. You’ve turned this whole blogging business into a fucking homework assignment. I should be watching a new episode of Breaking Bad, or… Continue reading