How I See Obama and Romney



Actually Ruprecht could probably do a pretty decent job. Sure, he’s noticeably retarded but so was the guy in office before B-Rock, and he got to play freeze tag with his also-retarded (or maybe just some kind of palsy) friends and their gardeners for 8 whole fucking years on our dime…….assuming you pay taxes. You’re a teat-sucking pussy if you do, by the way. I’m through with that garbage. I wouldn’t mind so much if I had any bit of say into where my dollars were going, or could dictate that the money IS NOT to go toward certain funds and/or programs. But thems is just dreamz, Fam. 

How shitty is T-Mobile? I was spoiled because I had a new iPhone 4S through Verizon up until just recently and I could put it in a Zip-Lock, duct tape it so it’s nice and compact and implant it deep in my ass, right next to Punxsutawney Phils apartment and still be able to call my mom and have a lovely talk about whatthefuckever. Granted, I’d be talking on a phone that was buried deep in my ass next to a fucking beaver, or whatever Phil is, who can’t make adult decisions.

I started this article a few days ago when I gave a shit. Happy Wednesday suckers. Remember, if you vote this year, you’re supporting multi nationals, banks, special interest groups, etc undoubtedly with nothing but our collective best interests at heart… So good job there, Fucky. Way to make a difference or whatever. Walmart, consumerism blabbady fucking blah, can you tell I’m slowly losing my shit? It’s paragraphs like this last one were I have to stop and say, good god man, what the fuck is wrong with you?! Then I remember that 90% of the population are mindless sheep and I’m cool and smart and I’ve been to the Cochella Festival and Apple commercial shopping mall engagement rings fuck yeah 4 door sport sedans double fuck yeah.

So there. Bitches.