2011: The Year of Apathy Part 1


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Friends,

Highlights.

1. Getting sober…for good this time, no more dicking around. Everybody be sure to drop me a line (please, not a “line” of cocaine, smartass) on Thursday January 5th, which will make it 6 months. Yaay me! Think I’ll celebrate with a bottle of Jack and a handful of oxycontin……..just kidding. That wasn’t funny. Moving on…

2. I celebrated my 1 year wedding anniversary with the CDO in October. If she can put up with my shit for a full year, it should be smooth sailing for ol’ Mike from here on out. I always wanted to be a sailor or maybe join the Navy and be a seaman. Either way, now I just put it all over my wife’s ass. She don’t find it to humorous at this age though…

3. The Descendents’ first Los Angeles area show since 1997 in Long Beach. Funny enough, I had a chance to see them in ’97 and missed them because God is a fucking asshole. And just to make things crystal clear, when I say “God” I’m imagining in my head, this guy:

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When Descendents released Everything Sux in the mid-late 90’s they did a fair amount of touring…mostly LA. For whatever reason, I never made it a point to go see them. KROQ Weenie Roast 1997; check this lineup (bands I can remember):

Radiohead, Blur, Oasis, The Cure, Echo & the Bunnymen, Social Distortion, Reel Big Fish, Wallflowers, Chemical Brothers, Mighty Mighty Bosstones and guess who else? The motherfucking Descendents, that’s who.

The shitbricks that did the scheduling put Descendents (side stage) on at the same exact time as Social Distortion (main stage). Really?!?! I don’t know, I could be stupid, but wouldn’t you think the typical Social D fan would probably be a fan of the Descendents too (and visa versa), no? I mean for fuck sake, they didn’t have Jesus and Abraham Lincoln on at the same time at Woodstock did they?! How’s about no the hell they didn’t. 17 year old me not realizing that over the next 15 years he’d see Social Distortion…ooooh, I’d say…about 35 or so times, he passed on the chance to see Milo, Bill, Karl and Steven channel Clean Sheets directly into my, then rosy and pink, heart.

What. The. Fuck. Ever.

4. Albert Pujols

5. Al Davis finally died.

Part 2 is coming soon.

P.S. – Sorry I haven’t written in a while. The holidays can kiss my pasty white ass. So can you while you’re at it. My 2012 resolution is to get more if you assholes to read this damn site so I’ll have more leverage to jump ship and start writing for a real website. This old bastard doesn’t want to sell insurance forever.

Also, when I was googling for images of God, I found these…you can pretty much substitute any one of these in if you’re Hindu, Muslim, or whatever…

For Tyler,

This is Mike Apathy signing off

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